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[title] => Branimir Periša: Malo su Rvatiman ‘sritni sati’ za kalavanje cina, tribaju in cile sritne godine...
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Živila Rvaska! - uzviknija je iz pune glave El Tigre ulazeći u betulicu Dobre Parone. Dreknija je odma još jedanput, napetih žila: “Živila Rvaska!”, ali umisto oduševljenoga odziva dobre i poštene gazdarice i njegovoga kompanjona, koji se skutrija u kantunu, dobija je jezikovu juhu.
Skrenija od teme
- Mučite, vrag vas ne odnija! Oćete mi Vučića navući na vrat, evo, jopeta govori da Zagreb Beogradu radi o glavi!? Šta bi bilo sada da mi isprid lokala sidu gosti iz Srbije!? Da se ljudi željni odmora ćute loše? Ostav’ te se zvizdarija, barenko u momen lokalu! - podbočila se dok je iž nje kuljalo ka iz Skradinskoga buka, sve po nesritnomen El Tigreu.
- Ma di gosti iz Srbije!? Pa Vučićev naslidnik na čelu stranke, Miloš Vučević ionako i dalje ne razumi Srbe koji iđu u Rvasku na litovanje. Tako je javno reka, pa očekujen da pošteni Srbi ne želu da ih se “ne razume, nego da ih ceo svet razume.” Prema tomen, sumnjan da će nan baš doći… - brani se El Tigre, na šta mu je ona rekla neka se ostavi toga, jerbo je narod narod, a Vučić i ekipa su drugo.
Na to je Bili Smo Uskoro teke skrenija od teme i postavija svomen kumparu logično pitanje. Daklen, neka živi Rvaska, fala bogu, ali koja? Ona od 25. lipnja ili ona od 30. svibnja…
- Eee, tu san te čeka! Zato san i uzviknija! - laknulo je El Tigreu šta mu trud ipak nije propa. Moj odgovor je da ne znan odgovor! - nastavija je. Jerbo, šta ja iman tute primudrivati ako oto ne znaju Milanović i Plenki, glavni ljudi u zemlji, pa niti na Dan državnosti ne potpisuju primirje, nego udri po Rvaskoj ka maksim po diviziji!
- I ja kažen! - begemaje mu B.S. Uskoro, čudeći se poslin svega komšijaman u Srbiji.
- Mora da je Vučić ozbiljno izvan škvare kada tvrdi da mu pritnja dolazi od države koja ne zna kada jon je udaren fundamenat. Zamislite u nekoj fantaziji da ministar obrane Bane naredi napad na Srbiju. A iz stožera mu odgovoru depešon da ne mogu izvršiti naređenje dok se ne odredi koje RH je on ministar.
- Zanimljivo... - zamislija se El Tigre dodajući da je običnin Rvatima svejedno kada se udrilo državne fundamente, kada ih udaraju svaoklen drugin oružjen. Cine divljaju, pa je upita Dobru Paronu bil’ ona svomen svitu dala uslugu po jeftinijoj tarifi, da se i Rvati malo okuse betulica i restorančića, da ne govorimo i da je spiza jeftinija!? Da se ne ćutimo ka zadnje škobe između turista u zemlji kojon smo udrili fundamente makar ne znamo kojeg datuma!? Druga je stvar da je klimavo ono šta smo nadoziđali…
Zakonski (ne)moguće
- Aaa, ne znan ja jel’ oto zakonski moguće! - uštapila se Dobra Parona. Dala bi ona jeftiniju tarifu sviman domaćiman - misli na cilu regiju - al ote popuste triba oglasiti, nema ništa šoto banka. Morala bi raditi “hepi oure” oće reći, ka sritne sate di se kalaju cine. Al’ ko će to, kada nan tribaju cile sritne godine, a ne samo sati? - nemoćno je slegnila rameniman.
- Da nije onaj u Kninu šta ga je uvatilo sa 3,3 promila alkohola da vozi traktorić sa prikolicon žurija baš na neki taki “hepi our” sa cinama samo za Rvate, makar stiga do Božića? - pita B.S. Uskoro svoga kompanjona.
El Tigre se zaprepastija da se kojin slučajon nije ispunilo ono vriđanje Ajdukovog Livaje: “Freze, traktori i seoski putevi…” na šta ga je Dobra Parona zakumila neka muči, jerbo će joj još Funcute na vrat navući…
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Živila Rvaska! - uzviknija je iz pune glave El Tigre ulazeći u betulicu Dobre Parone. Dreknija je odma još jedanput, napetih žila: “Živila Rvaska!”, ali umisto oduševljenoga odziva dobre i poštene gazdarice i njegovoga kompanjona, koji se skutrija u kantunu, dobija je jezikovu juhu.
Skrenija od teme
- Mučite, vrag vas ne odnija! Oćete mi Vučića navući na vrat, evo, jopeta govori da Zagreb Beogradu radi o glavi!? Šta bi bilo sada da mi isprid lokala sidu gosti iz Srbije!? Da se ljudi željni odmora ćute loše? Ostav’ te se zvizdarija, barenko u momen lokalu! - podbočila se dok je iž nje kuljalo ka iz Skradinskoga buka, sve po nesritnomen El Tigreu.
- Ma di gosti iz Srbije!? Pa Vučićev naslidnik na čelu stranke, Miloš Vučević ionako i dalje ne razumi Srbe koji iđu u Rvasku na litovanje. Tako je javno reka, pa očekujen da pošteni Srbi ne želu da ih se “ne razume, nego da ih ceo svet razume.” Prema tomen, sumnjan da će nan baš doći… - brani se El Tigre, na šta mu je ona rekla neka se ostavi toga, jerbo je narod narod, a Vučić i ekipa su drugo.
Na to je Bili Smo Uskoro teke skrenija od teme i postavija svomen kumparu logično pitanje. Daklen, neka živi Rvaska, fala bogu, ali koja? Ona od 25. lipnja ili ona od 30. svibnja…
- Eee, tu san te čeka! Zato san i uzviknija! - laknulo je El Tigreu šta mu trud ipak nije propa. Moj odgovor je da ne znan odgovor! - nastavija je. Jerbo, šta ja iman tute primudrivati ako oto ne znaju Milanović i Plenki, glavni ljudi u zemlji, pa niti na Dan državnosti ne potpisuju primirje, nego udri po Rvaskoj ka maksim po diviziji!
- I ja kažen! - begemaje mu B.S. Uskoro, čudeći se poslin svega komšijaman u Srbiji.
- Mora da je Vučić ozbiljno izvan škvare kada tvrdi da mu pritnja dolazi od države koja ne zna kada jon je udaren fundamenat. Zamislite u nekoj fantaziji da ministar obrane Bane naredi napad na Srbiju. A iz stožera mu odgovoru depešon da ne mogu izvršiti naređenje dok se ne odredi koje RH je on ministar.
- Zanimljivo... - zamislija se El Tigre dodajući da je običnin Rvatima svejedno kada se udrilo državne fundamente, kada ih udaraju svaoklen drugin oružjen. Cine divljaju, pa je upita Dobru Paronu bil’ ona svomen svitu dala uslugu po jeftinijoj tarifi, da se i Rvati malo okuse betulica i restorančića, da ne govorimo i da je spiza jeftinija!? Da se ne ćutimo ka zadnje škobe između turista u zemlji kojon smo udrili fundamente makar ne znamo kojeg datuma!? Druga je stvar da je klimavo ono šta smo nadoziđali…
Zakonski (ne)moguće
- Aaa, ne znan ja jel’ oto zakonski moguće! - uštapila se Dobra Parona. Dala bi ona jeftiniju tarifu sviman domaćiman - misli na cilu regiju - al ote popuste triba oglasiti, nema ništa šoto banka. Morala bi raditi “hepi oure” oće reći, ka sritne sate di se kalaju cine. Al’ ko će to, kada nan tribaju cile sritne godine, a ne samo sati? - nemoćno je slegnila rameniman.
- Da nije onaj u Kninu šta ga je uvatilo sa 3,3 promila alkohola da vozi traktorić sa prikolicon žurija baš na neki taki “hepi our” sa cinama samo za Rvate, makar stiga do Božića? - pita B.S. Uskoro svoga kompanjona.
El Tigre se zaprepastija da se kojin slučajon nije ispunilo ono vriđanje Ajdukovog Livaje: “Freze, traktori i seoski putevi…” na šta ga je Dobra Parona zakumila neka muči, jerbo će joj još Funcute na vrat navući…
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19. svibanj 2024 00:53
